Speech Pack\SPOT

                           Spot the Spoonmaker
                              by R. Corell

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   \--/nce upon a time, there was a family of penguins that lived inside a
meatlocker just outside of a gas station, just outside of Waxahachie, Texas.
Upon birth, each child was assigned a name and an occupation.  Now, by the
time the twenty-seventh son was born, all the good penguin names like
Quetzalcoatl and Wogoshoonberry were taken and there really weren't any
more occupations left in the meatlocker.  So, the twenty-seventh son was
arbitrarily declared Spot the Spoonmaker.

   Spot didn't realize that all of this was arbitrary and he set out to
be the very best spoonmaker he could be.  All of the day and all of the
night, Spot would fervently craft his spoons and contemplate his occupation.
But Spot was soon consumed with nagging doubts.  Were his spoons the best
they could be?  Were there other spoons in the world?  Other spoonmakers?
Was there more to life, the universe, and everything than the clammy
interior of a moldy meatlocker?  He began to wonder if there were a world
outside the meatlocker, a world full of not only spoons, but flatware of all
kinds.

   Spot went to his father and said, "Father..."
   And his father said, "Who the hell are you?"
   And Spot said, "I am your twenty-seventh son, Spot."
   "Spot?  Oh...uh...yeah, sure.  I can't tell any of you apart."
   "Father, as the family Spoonmaker, I would..."
   "Spoonmaker?  What are you talking about?  Eh?"  He then wandered away,
as he had no attention span.

   But Spot was undaunted.  He was a Spoonmaker.  He was the best Spoonmaker
in the world.  As far as he knew.  So he gathered the family together and
made a bold announcement.  "My family," said he, "I plan to journey to the
world outside the meatlocker."

   There was a general panic.  "Its dangerous out there!" they said.  "There's
nothing out there!" they said.  His father spoke, "Chinchinchikika, I don't..."
   "Spot, Dad, Spot."
   "Whatever.  You can't go out there, you'll get eaten by a walrus, just like
your Uncle Bob!"
   "But Uncle Bob is right over there in the corner."
   "Oh.  I can't tell any of you apart.  Still, its too dangerous."  The
rest of the family concurred with his sagacious advice, urging Spot to give
up his foolish dream.

   But Spot was a maker of Spoons.  He heroically strode to the door of the
meatlocker and threw it open.  The meatlocker, as has been explained, was
just outside of a gas station, just outside of Waxahachie, Texas, where it
was one-hundred and six degrees in the shade.  The meatlocker was not in the
shade and all the penguins died of heat prostration except for Uncle Bob,
who was eaten by a walrus.

   The End